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Why?
Why?
How come all these feelings of sadness come flowing my whole mind again? Is it due to the comics I read which triggers all these feelings?
Haiz.. It has been some time since i walk alone aimlessly in a chopping mall. No destination. Dunno from where I walk, to where I am heading to..
Sadness.. As much as I thought I had buried it deep inside somewhere secluded in my heart, it seems to reappear right in front of me.
Is it cos of her change of her current status from complicated to single? I dunno.. I really dunno. Haiz..
Browsing thru her testimonials, saw someone who's been trying to date her.. Is that undescribable feeling I am experiencing now jealousy? Is this jealousy due to the fact that I still have feelings for her? Or is it that I am juz jealous of a past that I had missed when I am with her, a present that I am not by her side, and a future that I cant have with her?
Alas..
Oh Lord.. Pls.. What is that feeling? Why is it causing hurt to me once again? Hadnt I let it go? Hadnt I lost all my feelings for her? Why am i still experiencing hurt?
Lord.. Why dont I have anyone to confide to except you? Why cant you answer my doubts more verbally rather than making me guess my answer thru? Oh Lord.. I need answers.. I need ways to get me out of this situation.. It has been dragging too long.. Much too long..
posted by Ivan Ee @
Where tears no longer flows..
Haiz.. Sometimes I wonder if I will ever let my feeling rules?
Juz not feeling too well.. It seems to be a long time since I last felt sadness? Or am I so numb in the past, that I only feel the sadness once again as it starts to re-poke me again?
There was once, where I had tears, but i controlled them, holding them back so that they dun flow out; It is now, where I want them to flow out, to release them, that I found out they are no longer listening to my command, my feelings..
By controlling my feelings, my tears, it seems to trigger off a strong front, a front stronger than wat i can take.. A front that seems so strong on the outside, yet so vulnerable in the inside. A front that shows everyone what a happy-go-lucky person I am, yet no knowing the inner me, the real me, the weak and vulnerable me..
Laughters are what I bring to others, but Sadness is the price of it.. The more jokes I cracked, the more sadness I endure..
At first, laughters are what I use to hide my feelings from others.. But dunno from when, it seems to hide the feelings even from myself.. I am self-denying..
By hidding my feelings away from me, away from others, I prevented myself from feeling hurt, being hurt by ppl.. This is the path I chose to walk in the past, unwittedly taking the wrong path it seems..
By hidding my feelings, it will accumulate.. Sooner rather later, it will explode.. Once it explode, extreme depression will take over.. By being depress, it will create more self-denial than any normal people can imagine.. It will move along this line, until the next stage sets in... The stage where by one tries to commit suicide due to tremendous stress.. Emotional stress..
Haiz..
The english proverb goes, "When you make your bed, You must lie on it"
I had long ago modified the proverb, quite a few years back, during one of my lowest time.
"As you dig your grave, You must die in it"
I had chosen my path.. It doesnt seem to me that there is a U-turn.. It seems that it is a 1-way road.. A road to no returns; A road where no lights are seen...
Alas..
posted by Ivan Ee @
PassWord Pls..
Haha.. I have juz set a password for my the other blog.. Lolz.. This is done to confirm that no idiots will go in to my blog and spam.. These few weeks, there was this idiot who keep pretending to be someone who is dear to me, trying to spoil my relationship with this someone.. That idiot try to do all sorts of things to make me misunderstand my friend..
Luckily I am not sway by his words and as time past, that idiot starts to show faults in his lies.. Idiots juz cant lie u know? l0lx..
In this world, Smartness Rules; Not Idiots..
posted by Ivan Ee @
I am back..
Haha.. Its been such a long time since I blog here.. Exactly 1 month..
Lots of things happen in the past 1 month.. Met some online idiots trying to act smart acting people whom they are not, and some more MLM companies looking to recuit me.. Sianz.. Dunno how come people from MLM always like to find me to join their company.. Dunno why so many friends like to make use of me.. Haiz.. Some friends.. Indeed..
Watched finish my Xian Jian Qi Xia Zhuan.. Sad story.. Sad ending.. Everyone died.. All the people whom I dun wish they would die died.. Haiz.. Even Ling Er died.. Poor thing..
Now hoping that Liu YiFei's Return of The Condor Heros will air soon.. Haha.. I am totally mesmorised by her.. LOL..
She looks cute sia.. But dunno how come WeiCai dun find her so.. Weird man with weird taste.. Lol... OK.. End here.. Nid to go bath then go out liao.. Cya..
posted by Ivan Ee @
All Exams Finish!
This morning, went to StarHub centre to take the Certified Financial Planner module 1 exam.. Went in with confidence, knowing that I can do almost all the questions in the mock test at ease now..
Went in, sit down, take out my 2 calculaters(1 financial calculator, 1 scientific calculator, cos I dunno how to use the F.Calculator to do normal calculations.. Haha..)
1 look at the first page and I almost fainted..
"WHAT THE!!" was my first expression..
It so difficult lo! As compare to Benson's questions in the mock test, this exam is like 1000 times more difficult lor! And these stupid questions are so time-consuming!! Almost every other question is those where by they ask you "Which of the following(s) is/are correct?", then they will gif you 4 answers, then they will ask you if (a)and (b) is correct; (a),(b)(,c) are correct, or all of the above..
This sort of questions are so time-sucker lor! Benson's questions after I do finish I still got so much time, but this one, I use 1/3 of the time just to do 1/4 of the questions!!
Then the stupid stupid stupid stupi BENSON!! Say what this module 1 exam to amortisation?! Come out 3 or 4 question on Amortisation lo!! In the end all of us were unable to do those questions!
ARGGGGG!!!!
Haiz.. Looks like have to go out to find job liao.. Find job, earn money, then retake the test again.. Haiz..
But 1 good thing to look at despite the pek cek-ness, I HAVE FINISHED ALL MY EXAMS!!
Technically, I am a free man now.. But alas.. Why do ppl look forward to be free? Its not as nice as you thought ya.. After being held down by school for so long, I seem so lost in the wilderness now.. Not knowing wat should be my next step.. Haiz.. Does this thing happen to me only, or everyone else too, only thing no one say it out?
Haiz..
posted by Ivan Ee @
Went to Sao3 Mu4 today
Woke up my Kim3Kim2, aka Uncle's wife.. Went to take a bath before setting off.. Felt something on my neck.. I tried to brush it off.. After that felt a sharp pain on my nipple.. I looked down and saw a black flying ant.. Damn!! It bite my NIPPLE!!! Idiot, Pervertic Insect!!
After that my nipple hurts for quite some time before the pain gone away..
Went to Malaysia.. This is my first time going to My Maternal GrandParent's grave.. Cant sense and form of grieve from anyone.. Perhaps becuase they had died for so long.. My Maternal Grandmother died more than 40 years ago, whereas my Maternal Grandfather died more than 20 years ago.. We put this coloured papers on top of their grave, althou I dunno wat for.. Their grave really look like those typical grave where you see in TV.. A tombstone in front and a big pile for soil at the back, with flowers growing on top.. The only difference from the real thing and the one shown on TV is that on TV, I dun feel hot as I have a fan blowing at me while watching..
The weather is so so so hot lo.. I am almost melting under the scorching sun..
After the visiting of their grave, we went to my 2nd Uncle's grave.. He died not too long ago.. Last year ard August thereabout.. They have even put his wife's name beside him, so that when she were to die, they will just bury her there..
After that went back to my relative's house.. Slept for 2 hours.. Woke up.. Slept for another 45 minutes.. Went to the Kitchen.. Eat some PoPiah.. Went back to the 2nd floor.. Watch my cousin playing games..
After that at ard 8pm, went back home.. As there were terrible traffic jam, reached home at 12mn.. 3 hours of jam.. Sianz..
posted by Ivan Ee @
WeiLi's Birthday..
Went to WeiLi's birthday at night, together with the entire SR friends.. Was late.. Walk for such a long distance before finally reaching her J06 room.. Grrr... By then I am sweating like mad liao le.. Why save that few couple of dollars when they can easily book a chalet in DownTown East (Pasir Ris)?? At least it had a busstop jus outside.. Idiots.. Because of the distance actually I almsot dun feel like going, if not for the sake of returning Jason his VCD and my $10 chip-in for her present.. Grrr....
Then they drag until heaven almost fell before they actually cut the birthday cake.. The time they cut the cake was 11.15pm.. Idiots.. I still nid to go to my uncle's house to stay lor.. Cos tml have to go Malaysia to Sao3 Mu4.. Actually wanted to go before the cutting of cake, but its not too nice.. Haiz.. Ivan... Stop being a good guy at times pls, at least dun do it at your own expense..
Then after cutting the cake still drag for so long with all the photo-taking and her idiotic frenz who talk cock like crazy.. Brainless idiots..
Pardon me if I am rude.. I am juz not in a mood to try and write good things about the chalet cos it really sucks as far as I am concern..
In the end I reached my uncle's house at 12.15am.. Its so Pai Seh lo.. If its my home I dun mind.. But I am staying at other people's house.. So late.. And tml they have to leave the house at 6am.. Haiz.. Felt so bad..
posted by Ivan Ee @
有时后我在想，是曾经拥有来得痛苦些，还是不曾拥有同苦。嗨！人世间怎会如此地可悲，如此地可哀可泣。
posted by Ivan Ee @
Used the SAS system today..
Went to the SAS system just now.. Was actually there to look at my results again.. Cos nothing to do..
Went to the Napfa section.. Althou' never intendin to take in school, but I click nevertheless, for the fun of it..
Saw this
" You are not allowed to sign up for the NAPFA test session, because of the following reason(s):
You are no longer an active student.
You are not a final year student. "
Haiz.. No longer a final year student, no longer an active student.. Glad, yet accompanied by more sadness than glad..
Looking back at the 3 years in Poly, I never seem to have achieved anything..
To others, being a Vice-Chairman maybe a great achievement, but not to me..
To others, passing every modules without the need of forwarding maybe an achievement, but not to me..
To others, getting more than 80 points for CCA may be a mavellous achievement, but not to me..
To others, being able to get a Dist in the exam slip may be an wonderful achievement, but once again, not to me..
Haiz.. Am I really asking too much? But what do I really want to achieve in Poly? Why do I have a feeling of emptiness in me when I had achieve what some others are not able to achieve?
Getting a Dist, so what?
Getting more than 80 CCA points, so what?
Being a V-Chairman for my club, so what?
Haiz.. Sometimes I tend not to be able to understand myself.. Perhaps I understand myself too well, thus not willing to face up to the truth.. Perhaps I juz needed some reassurance.. Haiz..
posted by Ivan Ee @
Got My CDP Acc..
Was on my way to the SGX, Singapore Stocks Exchange, while banging into Tim.. Tim was coming for the other direction.. So coincidental.. Haha..
Ask him to bring me to SGX, cos I dunno where it is.. In the end it was juz behind the MPH, beside DBS.. Chey.. Tot where.. Its that building lah.. I always pass by there in the past, only thing dunno that place is SGX..
Went to do my CDP account.. With Tim's help, I completed the whole process in less than 1/2 hour... Haha..
I OFFICIALLY GOT MY CDP ACCOUNT!!!
Now I can officially trade the stocks exchange myself.. 3 Cheer..
posted by Ivan Ee @
22 hrs count down to my Birthday
Time now is ard 2am, 19th of March 2006..
Countdown.. 22 hours away from my 21st birthday..
Another year older.. To come to think about it, I am growing older.. But then again, while getting old is of no choice, growing up is an option.. :D
This year once again, majority sld be my JC classmates.. the minority will come from Poly and Secondary..
But then, one point to take note is that someone will be coming to my birthday for the 1st time since I try to get the person to attend my birthday for the past 3 years.. Haha.. Hopefully that person will turn up this time.. It would surely be a remarkable feat.. That person will surely make my 21st brithday memorable one..
Unfortunately, I doubt the arrival of another person.. Cos I juz got this feeling that this person wont come.. Thou' I hope miracle will happen, hoping that the person will miraculously appear, I seriously doubt the possibility..
posted by Ivan Ee @
Death of Cat Uncle..Haiz..
Juz received a very sad news today.. Cat Uncle had died.. Haiz..
Received the new from my cousin, aka Jie..
Haiz.. Was really taken aback when I first heard the news from Jie.. I was on MSN halfway when Jie broke the news to me.. That was a really big shock.. Haiz..
Went for the Wake via a cab.. Reached there.. Saw XiaoGu and DaGu and AhGong.. Sat down with them.. Soon, Jie came along..
Was chatting halfway when Jie ask me if wanna go and put the josstick.. I agreed and went with her..
This was almost like our first time attending such a funeral.. While taking the josstick.. Jie's tears started to flow.. I can sense a very deep sadness in her, cos I can feel that too.. Cat Uncle had always been very good to the 2 of us when we were still young, when we were still staying with AhMa on a regular basis..
After that.. Went back to the table and eat the food..
Before we left, Jie suggested to go and take a final look at the body, asking me if I will be scared.. Haiz.. I am not scared.. How will I be scared? Why will I be scared of someone who had been so dear to me when I was still at a very young age? Haiz..
Went to the coffin.. Look thru' the glass panel and see Cat Uncle body.. He was rather black.. Althou' he was known to be very dark, he seems blacker than darker in the coffin.. Overall, he still look a bit rather nice.. At least his face had not sunken in, unlike my another uncle who died a few months ago..
While looking at the body.. I saw someone who sleep peacefully in it.. Someone whom I had respected so much.. Someone so close to my heart.. Someone who really love me and Jie as thou' we are his own kids..
Knowing that he will never be able to see us again, knowing that we will never see him again, my heart starts to feel so heavy.. I wanted to touch to glass panel of the coffin, so as to get closer to him, but dare not, in fear that it may not be allowed religiously..
Jie, who was beside me was crying sadly.. Really sadly.. I lent her my shoulder to cry on.. Haiz.. She was telling me not to control my feelings, cry if I want, cry if I need.. Haiz..
I am very sad.. Really very sad.. I really feel like crying also.. But tears never obey.. I can sense that I am on the verge of tearing, yet the tears will stop before it can flow out of my eyes.. In other words, I had long lost the ability to cry.. I cant cry.. I dunno how to.. Haiz..
When I saw my another uncle died that time, I was very scared that the eyes might just open suddenly.. But now.. Looking at CatUncle's body.. In fact, I am really hoping his eyes can open, telling us that he is not dead.. Telling us that it is all but a spam.. All but a joke.. But I know.. I still cant hide away from reality.. He is really dead.. Haiz..
From here on.. I will give a brief introduction about UncleCat, as a last tribute to the one Uncle who had been so dear in my life, even though he does not belong to my family, not even blood-related..
CatUncle, or Yiao Gu as Jie and I had always called him so affectionately.. From what I had heard, he was only a close friend of my AhGong.. UncleCat got his nickname because he is very good in climbing trees.. His real name was Hong Qing Liang, as written in the chines newspaper, the obitury page..
He was so close to my GrandParents becos he had fell in love with this person whom I dunno is who, but had close relationship with my grandparents.. So he will always come to my grandparents' house in order to get close to that girl.. Soon, they build up a very good friendship.. Unfortunately, he never won over the heart of that girl..
Fast forward.. When my mother had me, CatUncle, who was the only person who had a pickup.. Thus he stayed over at my AhMa's house every night, for fear that my mum will give birth to me anytime at night, so that he can fetch my mother to the hospital immediately when in need..
Fast forward again.. When I was still at a very young age, when I was still staying at my AhMa's house, CatUncle will always bring back home Durians and Crabs for us to eat.. It was also because of him that I learn how to eat and enjoy these 2 delicacies..
Whenever ChineseNewYear came, he will always come to my Grandparents' house and gives out angbao.. He will alway be one of the most generous in angbao money..
Unfortunately for the past few years, he had not been able to come to my Grandparents house, because of poor health.. However, he will stay put the angbao with my AhMa, asking her to pass the angbao to me and Jie.. He will do this every year without fail..
But this is the first year where I didnt receive his angbao.. Perhaps it also meant a bad omen.. Only thing I didnt realise it during that point in time.. Haiz..
According to his daughter.. He had been dianogsed with Cancer around the CNY period.. Haiz.. Becos it was so fast, the doctor didnt even managed to find out at which stage is his CancerCells at the point he passed on.. At the time he found out that he had cancer, he still tell his daughter that he wants to live on, agreeing to receiving the cancer treatment..
2 weeks ago, my aunty even called him.. That time he was already warded in the hospital, but he didnt break the news to my aunty.. He still talk normally.. Haiz.. Little did anyone knows that that will be the last time they will hear from him..
CatUncle stayed in the hospital for 2 weeks.. On tuesday, he went into a short coma.. His eyes had already hung upwards.. But suddenly he woke up again.. He started to seems as thou' he is very energetic.. However, the doctor said that he will not give CatUncle anymore medicine.. He refered CatUncle to the hospise.. A place where people wait there.. To die..
Haiz.. Not wanting him to know.. His daughter told him that she will be bring him to AngMoKio Old Folks Home.. CatUncle only heard the AMK part, thus thinking that he is going back home..
He was warded there at 10am.. He died shortly after, at 5pm.. During his death, none of his family members are there.. Haiz.. Perhaps CatUncle dunwan his close ones to be beside him when he died, not wanting them to feel sad for him.. Haiz..
CatUncle.. May you rest in peace..
posted by Ivan Ee @
Prom Night.. (Feelings)
"Same Initials.. Coincidence or Fated?"
This is the first nick I posted on MSN since I knew her name.. Despite knowing her for the past 6 months or so, I seem to keep forgetting her name, until we have another module in common..
Coincidence or Fated? Thats the question I posted 4 to 5 months ago.. To think it took me up to so long before knowing the answer..
A one-word answer, it could well take up a life time to ensure I find the answer.. Haiz.. But it seems to me it is more siding towards the former.. Haiz..
The reason why I am so "Da Tan" writing these feelings is perhaps due to the fact that I feel she will not read this blog.. I dun think she will even be interested in reading my blog.. Haiz.. Perhaps these feelings should only be written in my main blog, yet I choose to write it here.. Strange.. Dunno whats wrong with me today.. I dun seem the usual me, who only write my real heart-felt feelings in my main blog, cos not many ppl have access to it, thus keeping me true inner feelings within my small group of close friends, never leaking out..
She is wearing a black V-neck overall skirt.. Accompanied by a black scarf.. She looks absolutely gorgeous..
I am wearing a black, striped blazer, grey shirt, which purple striped neck-tie, accompanied by a black pants.. Sarah said I look good in that..
Actually I bought the neck-tie and blazer yesterday from Zara.. Dyed my hair this afternoon.. Blazer costing $299, Neck-Tie costing $59.90, Hair costing $112.40..
Donna asked me this question.. "Why waste so much money on the prom night? Are you spending so much because of one prom night? Or for one girl?"
Was actually taken aback when she shot me this question.. I wanted to look good.. But whats the real objective behind it? Am I so keen to look good in front of my class? In front of my friends? Or in front of her... I think I know the answer.. Actually I think Donna also know the answer, but none of us said it out..
Immediately after the prom night dinner, the whole class went to the outside of the Ball Room to take photos, with Lecturers and Friends alike..
Well.. I joined in the fun, since this may well be the last time I will be with the whole class.. Despite my physical being.. My soul is actually not there.. I was browsing thru' the sea of people outside the BallRoom, seaching in vain.. Finally saw her.. But she was with her other friends.. Shy as I've always been.. I did not, dare not approach..
Took more pictures with Lecturers and all.. Finally it took a ChinBoon to really boost my confidence, my guts.. Useless me.. Haiz..
ChinBoon was telling me that she looks very pretty tonight.. It will be a real pity if I were to miss taking a foto with her.. That was when my guts started to come back and find itself back into me.. It has always been weird on my side.. For some strange reason, I will always have difficulty with joking and talking heartily with the person I like.. I am able to converse with Raine so well, even though today is the first time we really talk to each other; Yet I will always be in a weird spot, never knowing what to talk to her about, how to joke with her, how to make her laugh and feel happy.. Haiz.. The trip with her to a place in Suntec is really a flop.. A terrible silent flop.. Almost total silence between us.. Haiz..
Tracking back to where I side-tracked.. After those motivational talk from ChinBoon, I started to have more confidence in myself.. Cos I know that its now, or never.. I dun want to regret not taking a photo with her.. Especially in such a wonderful night, where we both are wearing such nice outfits..
To my disappointment, she is nowhere to be found.. I was turning my myself in vain, starring hard at each individuals who passed back.. Yet to no avail.. Demoralised.. The rest of the class is having so much fun cos-playing while taking fotos.. Sadness is not hard to be seen on my face.. Demorlised is the word.. Demoralised..
It was at this point in time where I really pray.. Sincerely pray.. I confess, that I had never pray as sincerely as I did today.. I pray sincerely to God that I can take a photo with her today, cos this may well be the last time I can see her.. I prayed, crying for help to God.. So sincerely that tears almost flows.. Yet as hard as I wish it would ever flow out of my eyes, it didnt.. But the sensation of tearing is there..
The class started to get bored of the same old place.. So they decided to change the location to the stairways.. Demoralised as I was, I went with them..
Finally.. On the stairways, I saw her.. My prayers seem to have been answered.. Deep down inside, I was so delighted.. Yet at the same time, cowardness creeped in.. I am scared.. I dunno how to approach her.. How to ask her to have a foto taken with me.. What if I get rejected.. Wouldn't it be more demoralising on my side?
But then again.. What if I were to not take the foto with her, wouldn't I regret for the rest of my life? What if I were to continue to ponder, until she gone out home and I will never get a foto taken with her? What if her frenz were to stop her from taking foto with her, feeling I am not fit to be with her in the same foto?
Haiz.. So many what if speeding thru' my mind in the split moment..
KwokYann soon saw her.. I am still pondering what to do when I was scolded by him for being "Ha-mmm"
Haiz.. To think I need to be scolded in order to get my acts right.. Haiz.. Perhaps I am too prefectionist a person that I will not take any steps unless I am sure I will succeed.. This is also perhaps one of the reasons why I can never make the first step to getting a girlfriend.. Cos I am too scared of failure.. Loving someone is nothing.. But making the first move requires great guts as it invovles great risk.. Either you make it, or you break it.. I had always rank love as the highest priority in my life, thus I never dare to take risk in it, thus causing me never to be able to confess my love to anyone I like..
KwokYann offered to accompany me to go down together.. In order to lend me his camera, as well as to lend me his guts..
At last, I drew all the courage I ever had, perhaps even exceeding the courage I ever had.. I asked her to take a photo with me.. While asking her that, I dare not look at her directly.. Shyness is my biggest flaw in Love, Lack of confidence comes next..
She agreed, although I can sense unwillingness in it.. Haiz.. She passed her handbag and her black scarf to her friend and took the picture with me..
I was actually shivering out of nervousness when taking the photo with her.. While standing with her, I could actually feel that my legs are not standing striaght.. They are shaking.. Uncontrollably.. I never know I will be so nervous as that, since it is, but juz taking a normal photo..
But is this really a normal photo? To others it is, but not to me.. This photo will hold a great deal of meaningful memories.. It was her that I feel I had not wasted my Poly life totally.. It was her that causes me to feel that actually poly life is not that bad afterall.. It was her that really make me feel time is so short in Poly.. It was also her that make me feel like I should have changed class when I had a chance..
I am not saying that this class of mine is not good or anything.. In fact, DBF3B07 is a mavellous class to be in.. The only thing is that a good and united class was never really what I had long for ultimately in life..
Coming back, actually I wanted a full body photo, cos it will look nicer.. But I dare not ask too much from her, for fear it will build up hatred in her against me.. Haiz.. But at least I had a foto with her..
Finally saw her left the place, with her friends.. My heart had gone as well..
Prom Night.. The night signifying the last of Poly life.. Signifying the end.. Great fun to have it, yet if you look deeper into it, it actually brings together with fun a bad omen.. Many ppl wont felt it, cos they look at the surface of it, while I have a tendency to look deeper.. Sometimes to needless depth..
Sadness seems doomed to have engraved itself upon me.. Last day.. Will it also signify that last time I will be seeing her? Haiz..
posted by Ivan Ee @
Prom Night (Events)
Woke up relatively early today.. Cos nid to prepare myself for all the things before going to the prom night..
Actually wanted to wear a t-shirt to Taka first then after making my hair then i change into my formal wear.. But since no one is accompanying me to Taka as they were are having school, I changed my mind and wore my formal wear there..
Reached Taka at 3pm.. Actually booked the time with the hair-dresser at 3.30pm.. But since no one is there, he let me cut my hair immediately..
He said I looked too guai liao.. So helped me to cut a hairstyle which is not so guai.. Haha.. While cutting, the loose hair stuck onto my lips, making me feel as thou' I had grown beard.. The reason why the hair stuck onto my lips is simple.. Cos I had lip-blam on them.. Sianz.. I was forced to put on lip-blam..
After the cutting, the uncle helped got me the hair-colour book, asking me to choose.. Initially wanted the semi-golden colour, but he said it is out-of-fashion liao.. So he got me a brownish-golden colour, which almost cant see the colour unless under sun.. ARGGG...
The whole dying of hair lasted 19 mins.. Then an assisstant of the uncle helped to "put the colour into the roots".. Dunno why, but suddenly the hair scrap is so painful.. But no choice.. Anyway its juz 2 mins more.. This is wat I call "Ai Shui Mai Mia" or "Love Beauty Dunwan Life"..
After the dying of hair, they help me to put some chemicals in the hair to take away the smell of amonia or NH4 if the spelling is wrong and u dun understand wat I trying to write..
Sianz.. After all the cutting, the time is only 4.45pm.. Still got another 1 more hour to go before meeting Tim at Newton MRT Station..
Went to the Orchard Library.. Sat down read some books to kill time..
By about 5.45pm, went to the toilet to put on my neck-tie and Blazer.. Even took a photo of myself in the toilet.. Haha.. Nassicist..
Met Tim.. Went to the Sheleton Tower.. The place looks rather posh.. Not too bad.. Only thing got people smoking inside.. Sianz.. Cant stand the smell..
Then one by one the class ppl came.. Took quite a few group fotos with them..
Went up to the BallRoom, only to find out that we were sitting at the most back sit.. Sianz..
Continue taking some pictures at the BallRoom.. Saw SuLian with her classmate.. Almost cant recognise her.. She look very different from the normal her.. Well.. Not say Chio, yet not say Not Chio.. Juz weird..
Then the MC went up the stage to start the event.. He is a lame guy.. Really lame.. But I like his hosting.. Haha..
Marcus got the Prom King award.. Although I feel my choice of clothes is much better than him.. Maybe juz bcos he is tall bah.. Well.. Who knows..
After the dinner.. Went outside the BallRoom to take photos.. The took photos on the stairway too..
Then saw TeenYun and Rane.. Its rather nice chatting with Rane.. Cos she is a rather fun-to-be-with girl.. Took a foto with her.. Actually TeenYun asked Tim and I to accompany her class to watch movie, but Rane nid to go home, so cant accompany us.. Then after that TeenYun oso went home.. So in the end, Tim and I decided against going out with them, cos we agree to go becos of TeenYun, and since she is going home, no point going out with them..
In the end, Tim and I went home respectively..
posted by Ivan Ee @
Finished 1st paper yesterday..
Well.. Study from 3am onwards until the paper ends..
Went to bath at ard 6am in the morning.. Then go to school liao.. Cos was intending to study on my way there..
Actually can take MRT to school, but I feel like taking a bus so that I can study on the bus..
While on 74, I study.. Duh.. Haha.. (Duh = Obvious)
Then comes the terrible thing.. I think I Yun1 Che1, aka faint bus.. Dunno why leh.. Never had such a thing before.. I think is because the bus got no AirCon.. Then oso there was a short jam near MacRichie there.. Then the smoke there was terrible.. Arrr...
Anyway.. I managed to come to school intact.. Haha..
Almost lost my way to T18.. Went to T17 instead.. Luckily my animal instinct told me something wrong.. Wahahah.. Saw JunLing studying at the stairways there.. So I join her lor..
Then nearing the exam time, we make our way to the door, and saw most of the class ppl there liao le.. Almost everyone told the others who are studying not to study liao.. So fan.. Ppl want to study let them study lah.. Dun disturb them mah.. Whether what they study last minute can go into the mind is non of ur concern mah.. Why care?
Anyway.. Went into the exam hall.. At first, saw the paper.. A bit scared. Cos I am not very confident in this paper.. Cos oso I didnt revise the first 3 chapters at all.. Cos Tested before liao..
During the first 10 minutes.. Keep staring in front.. Perhaps to loosen myself up..
Once the paper starts.. I started doing.. Duh!
Well.. Did rather slowly at first.. By the end of 1 hr I still doing question my 3rd short answer question.. So I ditched my nice writing and traded for a hand writing that will cos the marker's myopia to increase by another 100 degrees.. :D
After finishing the paper.. Was rather relieve.. Cos I find the paper rather easy.. But then I saw quite a few ppl like frowning a lot.. Some say the paper very hard.. Strange.. Haha.. At least I know that I will have at least 5 out of 100 correct.. Cos the question is directly from the last tutorial.. Haha.. And I juz studied that on the bus.. Haha.. I saw Tim not frowning oso.. So I presume he will get at least an A for this paper liao..
Anyway.. I feel I will sure pass this paper.. Not trying to be proud thou'.. Juz have this sort of feeling.. Whatever grades I will get is another thing.. Passing is a more impt criteria as compared to grades isnt it? Without even passing, how on earth can anyone get an A or B, or even distinction?
Anyway, all I am aimming for is just a pass.. So why care? I dun believe in those words saying that "Aim for an A, and you will get at least a B; Aim for a Pass, and you will most probably fail".. Well, at least that mindset dun work for me..
I will always aim for a pass, and strive for the best.. Cos by exceeding your aim, you will be a happy person if you know u achieve it.. For ppl who aim for an A, if you get a B, you will be very sad and it might affect the subsequent papers that you are taking..
For me, I aim for a Pass, if I get a C, I will be happy that I dun nid to forward that module, if I get a B, I will be very happy, if I get an A, I will be on clouds nine!
Perhaps because happiness had ditched me for so long, thus I use such a reverse pychology theory to bring some back.. I feel that happiness is much more impt than anything else.. Happiness will be able to make someone reached his or her potential.. Cos when you are happy, you will be more willing to learn and do, thus helping you on the way to reaching you potential..
Thou' Love will help someone to exceeds his or her potential.. Haiz..
posted by Ivan Ee @
Crying without tears is the saddest thing
Crying without tears is the saddest thing that can ever happen to a person.
Think about it, during the death of your close ones, you can see so many people crying their hearts out, hugging each other, seeking for comfort. Yet you are the only one without tears. You know that you are sad, you wanna cry, yet tears doesn’t flow out. You have lost your ability to cry at the point in time. The suppression of the feeling is grinding you deep down, from inside the heart, yet insensitive people thought you are just another heartless fellow who doesn’t have feelings for the deceased, reprimanding you straight in the funeral...
Another scenario...
The person you love so deeply, so truly, one day tell you that she had another person in mind, and will not want to have anything to do with you. You know it is not right to try and break them up. Yet, you are feeling so badly inside. The love you had cultivated over the years for that person instantly turned into nothing more than dust. You two may still be friends. Normal friends. But sadness had by then consumed you. You have lost your ability to cry at this point in time, perhaps forever. You have gained a new ability while losing the ability to cry..
“To Laugh”
You laugh at her. You laugh at the world. Yet, the greatest joker of all is none other than you yourself. You are laughing at yourself. You are on the verge of falling apart. You are on the verge of insanity. You are at the verge of losing yourself. Laughing is the only thing you can do. Your mind is empty, it is storing nothing but flashes of memories of you and her. Sad ones, happy ones, all came flashing by your mind.
Your heart is bleeding.
You are in pain.
Tremendous pain.
A pain which no one can ever imagine.
A pain that even death won’t cure.
A pain which will follow behind you forever.
You can never again run away from this pain.
The more you run, the faster this pain chases you.
Running is not the solution to it, Death alone cant help much, Facing to it will turn you mad, Madness will bring you nowhere.
You try to avoid speaking about the topic.
You tell yourself time will heal all things.
You try to convince yourself you don’t love her anymore.
Your find all the reasons you can have to undone the love you had for her.
But there is a force stopping you. Defeating all the things you have done to try to forget the person, to forget the feelings you once had for that person.
It’s an invisible force.
A strong force.
The strongest force which can make you and break you instantaneously.
The Power Of Love.
The love you had for her.
Seeing that love had defeated you once again causes the heart to bleed, the tears to flow. It is only when these tears that you had been suppressing for so long flows out from you eyes can you feel a form of relieve. You finally let out your feelings. All the suppression of feelings come blasting its way out of you through these tears.
Make good use of these tears. Treasure them. They don’t come much too often. You may not be able to cry anymore in the future. You are too numb to cry anymore. Hopefully you will feel much better after tearing...
How nice it will be to cry... Sadly, crying seems to be an impossible task for the writer of this blog entry. Tears are at the back of the eyes... Crying may seem to be the easiest task on earth, yet the hardest for some, impossible for one.
Alas..
posted by Ivan Ee @
In School.. Studying Portfolio Management.
Sianz.. Supposed to be studying for my Portfolio Management Exam one.. Which will take place tml morning 9am.. But then I am so sianz liao.. Still got about 3 more topics to go.. Lots of tutorial to do before I am able to claim that I had study finish..
Donna and AngLayPeng are on the way to T17 now for their Financial Managment Exams now..
This morning while I am on my way up to find AndrewLim for the PastYearExamPaper, saw ZhiWei and her friends bah.. But didnt see CW..
Haiz..
So bored now.. Sld I go study now or not? The time no is 1.51pm.. Tired..
Ohh.. Juz rmb.. I always wanted to post 1 of my past entry into this blog.. Cos that entry is the best I had ever rewritten on a blog.. At least thats what I feel.. Even GekKiah oso say that that entry can really bring her into the mood I was having then.. Haha.. Anyway.. I had edited it abit here and there.. The editing will not spoil the meaning of the story.. So rest assured that you will still get the gist of the story..
posted by Ivan Ee @
Mystery of the Missing PLAY...
Based on Real Life Event..
Incident Adapted From Ivan Ee..
Event Taken Place.. Compass Point in SengKang..
Director.. Ivan Ee
Main Cast.. Ivan Ee
Supporting Cast.. Lady at Customer Service
The story happens today afternoon.. 1.30pm..
I was on my way to Compass Point to return the DVD i borrowed from this very cool machine by the name of PLAY.. This machine is located at the entrance/exit of the SengKang MRT Station..
Let me tell U more about this machine, for the benefit of those ppl who totally dunno wat the machine is all about..
There is the Machine which is out in the market for roughly more than a year.. It is a machine whereby it allows ppl to borrow DVD at a rate of $4.50 for 24hours.. For every 1 hour overdue, it will charged the customer dunno how much.. Haha.. Cos I never overdue so I dunno the rate.. PLAY will always update their list of DVDs and one can even buy DVD from that machine.. PLAY is also very personalised, for eg, they even need your ThumbPrint to verify your identy.. Crap but safe..
Ok.. Off with the introduction.. I was on my way to return the DVD which I borrow yesterday.. The title of my DVD is call "Perhaps Love", aka "如果爱".. Upon reaching the place where I borrowed the DVD yesterday, I was shock! THE PLAY MACHINE IS NOWHERE TO BE FOUND!!!
Oh My God!! Holy Gracious!! Mother Teresa!!
My first thought in mind.. I am suffering from Amnesia!! Shoosh!! I am but 20 years of age.. So young kanna Amnesia.. I am such a poor cute little soul.. Wee.... (T_T)
Hey.. Wait a minute.. The Machine muz be there yesterday.. I am so confirm.. I saw it there yesterday! I borrowed the DVD from that location!!
Okay.. Since I am so confirm I saw it there, it proves that I am not suffering from Amnesia.. I am suffering from Hallucination.. (-_____-) (That is the problem with studying too much Psychology.. )
Ok.. Off with the crap.. I went down to the basement and search in vain for the legendary Customer Service Counter..
There is this Aunty sitting there at the counter staring her Computer Screen.. I approached her and told her about the Mystery of the Missing PLAY.. She told me that the PLAY machine is at the entrance/exit of the MRT there.. (OMG!! SHE IS ALSO SUFFERING FROM HALLUCINATION!! SAME TYPE AS ME!! :D)
I replied that it was no longer there..
She gave her colleague a call and got a reply that it had been moved.. Moved to somewhere near the 7-Eleven..
Ok..So I went over there and look for it.. But to no avail.. Shoosh! I kenna blaffed!! I went back to that Aunty and asked her again.. She refer me to the MRT station Uncle to verify the location of the Missing PLAY..
YEAH!! After consulting the MRT Uncle, the Missing PLAY had been recovered!! In the end the machine was outside the DBS Bank.. Haha..
~The End~
posted by Ivan Ee @
Last lesson in BD
Last BD lesson.. Last day with this class.. Saw ChinBoon coming into the class.. Ask if his illness got better.. Cos last Thursday he was sick..
Still rmb the first time knowing him is during our first week of Industrial Training Programme.. Nice Chap.. But only worked with him for 1 week before he got transfered elsewhere..
Last time seeing TeenYun, Jac, ZhiCheng in during BD class.. Still rmb how we meet.. Tim and I had to go to T14 to find them in order to get their names and admin number for us to register them for the BD groupings.. Tim and I was cursing like mad.. Cos the weather then was rather hot.. But then again, as we had just ditched another 2 person cos Tim dun like them, Teen Yun and Jac was our only choice left.. First thought about them.. Sisters.. Cos they seem to share the same surname.. Tee.. But they looks totally different.. After asking them, then we found out that although they share the same english spelling, their chinese surname are actually diffierent, thus stating the fact that they are indeed, not sisters..
Well.. After the first meeting with them, Tim and I start naming them the "taller and fatter" one, and the "Shorter and more chio" one.. Haha.. Nothing offensive, cos we cant group them with their own respective names.. First look, first time knowing this 2 names..
A few days later.. TeenYun introduced ZhiCheng to us, making him the 5th and final member of our group.. First impression of him.. His teeth is stained.. No offence here again.. Cos I have a tendency to look at ppl's teeth on first meeting.. At first thought that he is the stead of TeenYun, cos they seem to be very close.. Its only after verifying with Jac after the meeting that clear the doubt the they are not together..
First outing with the BD group.. We met at Raffles City.. Tim was wearing formal, cos we were suppose to be having ITP in the morning.. But I pon on that day, thus not wearing formal.. ZhiCheng was the only person late that day.. In the end he took a cab down to meet us.. This is the meeting where we set our position, as well as the ground rules for our BD.. We were required to write down all the rules for each other, like being punctual for meetings and stuff.. Well.. We juz write whatever crap we can think of, knowing jolly well that it will play no part in our BD meetings in the future.. Haha.. It is oso during this meeting where Tim was appointed as the overall Leader of our BD group.. TeenYun is Phrase 1 leader, ZhiCheng is Phrase 2 mkting leader, I am the Phrase 3 financial leader, while Jac is the Final Phrase Leader.. After settling all these matters.. We took a photo of ourselves in front of Robinsons, as a part of the requirement set by the BD department, as a proof that we had meet up each other..
First Meeting.. First Photo.. First Outing..
posted by Ivan Ee @
Pyschology Final Presenation..
Was suppose to be meeting my psychology group at 8.30am this morning.. But cant wake up on time, thus i was about 15 minutes late..
Reach Library, only to find out that I am in fact, the first person from the group to reach school.. -__-
Saw Andy and Andrew wearing long sleeves shirt and jeans, I got a shock.. Cos I tot we said that we will be wearing semi-formal, aka shirt and jeans.. And I always take it for granted that semi-formal oso means shirt sleeves shirt.. Oh My God!!
posted by Ivan Ee @
2nd last week
Juz found out this morning.. This week is the 2nd last week whereby we got school.. Haiz.. Time is really catching up.. Fast..
posted by Ivan Ee @
Losing of Motivation..
Haiz..
This is the last lapse to the completion of Poly life.. Yet, my motivation seems to be losing all its stream..
Its a known fact, as least to me, that most of my motivation had been lost since leaving SR.. Yet little did I expect that it will leave me for good juz at the crux of my educational life.. One last push towards the end and all will be over and done with, yet at this very climax I seem to be giving it an anti-climax..
Haiz..
posted by Ivan Ee @
Moodless..
Haiz.. Moodless to go for Treasury Options lecture after my psychology class, thus i pon..
Why moodless, thats for me to know, for you to find out..
If you have access to the other blog.. Go read.. If not.. Continue wondering..
Anyway, Oso moodless to continue writing this entry.. Haiz..
So wat if I have lots of mood.. No one will come to view this blog anyway.. At least those who I hope would come will, more likely than not, not come..
Haiz..
Demoralising..
posted by Ivan Ee @
T2258.. Doing nothing..
Once again... I am now in the classroom on T2258, waiting for the arrival of Ms Ong at 4pm.. Cos James and KY is presenting their BD project to their clients..
Well.. Dunno where Tim gone to, but the rest of the team mates are still here.. Sianz.. They were deciding on where to go for our group outing.. While the poor me still sits in front of the computer, sqeezing to the last drip of brain juice to try and figure out if there are anymore short-comings about my Psychology Experiment.. Currently only thought of 6 short-comings.. Am intending to think of more short-comings, but then again, if I think of too much, what does it says about our experiment? ermmm..
Haha.. But then, nevertheless, will try to think of more bah..
Sianz.. 26th of January liao.. In less than a month's time, final exams are starting, signalling the end of Polytechnic life.. How I hope I can extend the time.. Not enough time.. Just not enough.. Haiz..
posted by Ivan Ee @
BD Presentation
Sianz.. Today got Biz Development, aka Final Year Project, Final Presentation.. Confusing? Haha..
Msged TeenYun this morning once I woke up and ask her wats the colour of the Shirt I wore last time while doing BD presentation.. Haha... Cos that time she said that I keep wearing the same colour for BD presentation.. -__-
She forgot.. So I juz grab anything is in front of my eyes, which happens to be a G2000 Dark Blue shirt..
Went to school, rush to the Biz Library to print out the slides handout for the 3 testers and 1 set for our own reference..
Went to the classroom where we will be having our presentation.. In the end the teacher asked everyone who is not in our group to leave the room.. Haiz.. Stupid teacher.. Why cant she juz let everyone stay in the class.. Haiz.. Demoralised in the inside, forcing yet a smile upfront.. Haiz.. Pathetic..
Off we start, with Jac as the first presenter, followed by ZhiCheng..
Well.. Their presentations are as good as ever.. Haha.. Of cos they muz be good.. If not why would the rest of the group get them to present leh.. Duh...
After the presentation comes the killer.. Question & Answer session..
We wre questioned on our differnent discount rate that we've used in our 3 recommendations.. Shoosh.. That is a question that no one anticipated.. Grr.....
Other than that question, we managed to put up a rather not bad Q&A session..
Well.. We were asked to go out for a 5 to 10 minutes break for them to discuss our results..
While waiting outside, the 5 of us were wondering what score will we get.. Haha.. ZhiCheng suggested that the person whose guess is closest to the real final results will get a free treat of desert during our outing.. We have been thinking of a having a dinner together to celebrate the end of BD for our group, but still dunno where yet.. Haha.. Will be discussing real soon, most prob immediately after we had completed the BSG game report..
Well.. Back to the guessing game.. Tim was the first one to try, 75 marks was his guess.. I said we will get 80.. Tim commented that I may be too optimistic.. Well, nay.. he is juz too pessimistic.. ZhiCheng said 85 marks, but changed his mind later to 83.. Frickle Minded fellow... Haha.. TeenYun said 77 if I didnt rmb wrongly.. But i had forgotten wat Jac said liao.. :P
Wahaha.. Guess What?! I got it correct!! Yipee!! Free Desert.. Hopefully not the cheap cheap type.. Wahaha..
The rest of the class soon came back 1 by 1, except for ChinBoon who didnt come back.. Bad Boy.. Haha.. At last.. Everyone's back.. The whole class is one again.. :D
Sadly.. The lesson lasted only a short while before it ends.. Juz before ending, TeenYun asked the teacher if my group still nid to come back for future BD lessons or not.. Well.. Duh.. Still nid to clock up our attendence..
While she is asking that question... A surge of feelings out of nowhere comes overflooding my heart, suddenly.. Isn't it suppose to be a happy feeling that I sld be experiencing, especially since we had completed our final presentation? Why is it so that my heart, instead of feeling happy, is feeling the opposite instead? Could it be that we had, over this period of nearing to a year, build up such a good relationship that I dunwan it to end so soon? Or could it be something else?
Haiz.. Time never seem to be at my side when I most needed it..
2 months more.. 2 months..
2 months more to short term happiness? Or to enternal regrets?
Alas..
posted by Ivan Ee @
Didnt go for TO lecture today..
Haha.. Pon sch today.. Cos this morning no Pychology Class today, and left only TO lecture later in the afternoon, thus i didnt see a point in going for the lesson..
While being online in the morning, saw XianHuan online.. Jio-ed by her to accompany her for an interview.. This XianHuan is getting better and better in her Ji1 Jiang4 Fa3.. Cannot stand her..
She said this to me on messenger, "u wanna go wif me? wahhahaa, i m kidding la , i noe u dun want de"
-____-
In other words she is leaving me no chance of rejecting.. how sweet...
Haha.. But then again.. Dun mind going out with her for the interview lah.. Anyway i really have nothing to do.. So we went to Les Meridian Hotel for the interview..
Well.. Errr.. hotel.. err.. luckily no one sees us.. Opps.. :P
Nay.. That hotel is not exactly a hotel lah.. It looks more like a shopping centre.. and the work she was going to interview was in one of the shops..
While in the shop, saw Rosalind Pho.. I think her name is spelt like that bah.. Anyway is the PopCatz that girl.. Wahaha.. She looks rather chio.. But then again, saw her for only less than 5 seconds before she went into her office.. Grrrrr.. Didnt get to ask her for the autograph.. But then again.. Even if she stand there until old, I dun think i will ask her for autograph too.. Juz not interested in Celebrites.. But then again.. If the person is BoA, I sure go up to her, shake her hands, then dun wash my hands for 3 months!! :D
Reached home.. Took a bath.. Then on the computer.. Then was chatting on MSN.. Someone asked me why is my nick on MSN always so sad.. Well, This is not the first time ppl said this to me.. Haha..
Honestly, the tone of the nick of a person, more often than not, reflects what he or she is feeling.. Well.. To me, there is really nothing to be happy about.. Perhaps juz a bit too tired of life..
Success is how people achieve what he or she had set out to do.. In other words, success is based more on personal level, rather than expectations..
An easier way to explain it is like, if one sets a goal in life and that is to get to kiss BoA for example.. If he gets to kiss her now or in the future, he will be a successful person to me.. If he didn't get to kiss BoA, even if he can get all Distinctions in his academics results, even if he is the world's next Bill Gates or Warren Buffett, he is still an Unsuccessful Person..
I had clearly not yet fulfil what I have set out to do in life, thus the feeling of sadness..
Hopefully this explains and answers the question... Althou' there is still a lot of "holes" in my answers.. Haha.. Doubt anyone will be interested anyway..
posted by Ivan Ee @
BD lesson..
Haha.. So sianz.. So I come online to type an entry..
Btw.. I am now at BD lesson.. Sianz.. Still have to wait for the test to start.. Then later still have to do BD project cos this coming Monday will be our final presentation.. Sianz.. Feel like slping now.. So tired.. Yawnz..
posted by Ivan Ee @
Juz got home from AFP Lessons
Yawn...
Woke up at 8.30am.. Got a terrible shock.. Cos I am supposed to wake up at 7am, unfortunately it seems that only 1 out of the 3 alarms went off, thus I cannot wake up then..
Immediately rush to the toilet.. Pour water over my body.. Dry myself.. Grab any T-shirt.. Wear the jeans lying on my floor.. Grab a bag.. Throw the lecture notes inside.. Went to kitchen.. Drank some water.. Open the door.. Rush into the lift.. Out of the lift.. Rush to the Busstop.. No Bus.. Saw Cab.. Took Cab.. And off i go to the Royal Brother Building located at Raffles Place..
I didnt even have the time to comb my hair or to gel it.. Haha.. But then again.. Who cares.. Well knowing that only KY, James, Fir, and Sandy will get to see me.. :P
Reach there juz in time for the class to start, only to find out that I had brought the wrong notes.. ARRrrrrr.....
Got a foolscape from Fir to take down some notes..
The lecture was rather slow moving, but luckily I didnt fall aslp.. But then, my stomach is grumbling like nobody business.. Rather sian.. Cos everything being taught had been learnt in Poly.. But then again.. In 2 lectures of the AFP, aka Associate Financial Planner, course, it had covered all the 3 years of Poly topics!! Trust me.. I would love to hate to know what is coming up in the next 3 lectures.. Cos it will mean I will get to see alien topics coming up.. x_x
Half time into the lecture, got a 20 min break.. Drank a cup of 3-in-1 coffee.. Not to keep myself awake, but to stop my stomach from grumbling for a while..
Half way into the 2nd half of the lecture.. Heard from Sandy that today's lesson is actually 4hrs!!
~Faint~ x_x
As the teacher is rushing for time, cos she cant finish the thing.. She skipped quite a big portion of the last few topics..
Sandy said something like,"她(refering to the teacher)教了跟没有教一样"..
Feel like answering her(as in Sandy),"她(refering to the teacher)了解就够了嗎."
But then again.. according to the Madness Commandments of Ivan, aka MCI, "Thou Shalt Not Be Rude or Sarcastic", thus I didnt say out..
If ya cannot sense the sarcasm towards the teacher in the phrase, good for ya..
posted by Ivan Ee @
First Blogging In this New Sensored Blog :D
Haha.. After so many days of working this blog, and finding out how come I cannot put title and all forms of obstacles, I finally conquer every hardship and set up this blog..
Well.. This is the 2nd blog thou'.. In fact this is a Franchise of my 1st blog.. :)
Well.. This blog will be rather sensored thou.. Cos the pervious blog too much Philosophies involved, thus I feel that it will bored ppl out.. So better start another one so as not to bored ppl out..
This oso means that I will have 2 times the workload in updating this 2 blogs.. Arrrrr.... Stress stress stress... x_x
Anyway.. I will soon be editing the outlay of the blog again.. Cos still got some things haven figure out how to do yet.. Haha..
Ok.. Now.. Should I end here? or sld I continue..?
Lets end here for this first entry bah..
Take Care.. :)
Disclaimer:
1. My blogging have a tendency to write a lot of thinking and feelings.. All feelings and thinkings are all one-sided, from my point of view.. Any clashes of views will not be held responsible by the Blogger, aka Ivan Ee..
2. Some parts may be too cold to read.. Read them at your own freezing risk.. Any injuries due to froze-bite or becoming ice sld not be able to held the Owner, aka Ivan Ee, responsible..
posted by Ivan Ee @
| Links |
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Eugenia Hoon Ching Jia Wen Lay Peng Lesley Mei Yin Puifang Samartha |
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Toshiro Masuda - Grief and Sorrow |
| Courtesy of Interestin.com |